Have you ever questioned rather you have the right to love someone? Do you need permission to love a person? Is love a right, privilege, or something else?
I never really thought much about until reading a series where someone asked for permission to love someone else. It made sense in the context of the story, but what about in real life? I’ve seen in the movies and on tv the question of, “Will you let me love you?” but what does that even mean?
Love is something that occurs naturally. You can’t force yourself to love something or someone. Increased exposure can improve how you feel towards something and may, in turn, become love, but I don’t believe it’s the exposure that is prompting it. Love is an emotion. You can’t control how you feel, but you can control what you do with that feeling.
In that sense, asking for permission to love someone is pointless…that is, unless you are asking for permission to show your love. There are many ways to show love and some of those ways you should have the permission of the other person before you start expressing them. there are many ways to express love and sometimes people are uncomfortable with certain expressions of it.
For example, you can show you love someone by holding hands. But not everyone likes PDA so you might get permission for that. When you take someone on a date, you typically ask if the person is available and wants to go, you ask permission. But what about in nonromantic situations?
If your way of showing love will potentially invade in someone boundaries, it may be wise to seek permission, some sign that it is okay to advance. The thing is, when you love someone you respect them and don’t what to do things to push them away. It is important to take into consideration what the other person wants as well.
You have the right to love whoever you want to love. You don’t need permission for that. Though it does at times seem appropriate to ask when you haven’t always shown the person that you care. I personally think that when someone is asking for permission to love someone they’re really asking a completely different question. I think they’re asking “Will you let me be a part of your life?”
The two questions are very different from each other. As I already stated if you love someone you respect the person, and if you respect the person you should be willing to give the space even if you don’t want to do so. Sadly, not everyone who we love wants us in their lives. Some have reasons that we find valid, but other don’t. Sometimes it’s due to reason beyond our control that we must leave of our loved ones.
Being in the life of someone we love isn’t a right. Most are privileged enough to be able to do that. You do have the right to love whoever you want. There are different types of love and no one can tell you what is right when it comes to what type of love you experience. Some types of love are more acceptable than others in the eyes of society, but thankfully we do not need to ask permission for this.
Could you image having to ask for permission to love your parents and siblings? How about asking if it’s okay to love your favorite movie? That sounds odd to me. You can’t control what your heart, or brain, feels about someone. So don’t ask if you can love, ask to be part of their life. Ask to be by the side of those you love. Ask if it’s okay to kiss them for the first time. Ask for their hand in marriage. Ask if you can spend the rest of your life making them happy.
So I ask you, will you give permission to be a part of your life? I don’t know you personally, but I care about you. I care about you enough that I can say that I love you. I love this world and the people in it. We’re all beautifully flawed and that is one of the things that I love about being human. The moment you read this blog I became a part of your life. Maybe just for a moment. If allowed I would like to continue being a part of your life.
Go and love who you want. I hope all of you lovely people allow others into your life and have people who allow you into there’s as well. I’ll talk to you next post, lovelies.